Black child, you are ENOUGH!

As women we have this innate thing of making ourselves feel better by shutting down each other or by finding a way to deem each other’s light. Which makes no logical sense to me because In my mind my friend’s success is my own. And when another woman, especially a black woman, succeeds we all succeed. That to me screams hope. Their success to me let’s me know ukuthi there is still hope for the rest of us out there and that our struggles aren’t in vain.

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I am fascinated by the women in my life. I would be lying if i said I haven’t been blessed with the epitome of what I consider to be immaculate strength, unconditional love, immeasurable kindness and unfailing inner beauty. All the women are a constant reminder and representation of every good thing there is in the world. Now, you may say I’m quite optimistic; you wouldn’t be wrong. But I have grown enough to have learned that it does no one any good to focus on the negative. Be it my own negative or the one outside of me. Negativity drains, we all know this; it drains you until you until you have nothing left and it gives you no good thing in return.

Oprah Winfrey is everyone’s role model, well, almost everyone. I mean, the woman is a clear portrait of selflessness. And one thing she has been open and adamant about is putting woman of colour, black woman in lamen terms, in the forefront by celebrating their victories, achievements, and successes. She has gotten to a place in her life where she is no longer intimidated by another woman’s success; even possible success. If anything, she will pull them to the front of the line and let their light shine for all to see. Now, to me, that’s a woman who understands the ideal of what being a genuine woman is all about. I wish more of us, black women in particular,  were more like this.

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I once read a story a bout a man who once said that after having spoken to a young lady about her concern of being as kind-hearted and pure as an old lady she knows. His response was “well, how old are you?” she said: “20” “and how hold is this lady?” he asked. Her response was: “well, she’s about 80.” He looked at her and said: “well, sister, I think you still have 60 more years to go ‘till you are like this lady.”

Of course it’s gonna take time and a lot of selfless practice to get to that space before we get to the point where more woman are able to find joy in each others success. But the idea is to get started now. Decide today as to the kind of woman you want to be and be her on purpose. Think of all the wonderful attributes you could convert and cultivate. Write down who you want to be and who you want the world to see and who you want the world to know then choose to be that woman. I’m not saying go be a doormat; I'm simply encouraging you to be your true self because by dimming your light isn’t doing any favours for the rest of us who want to bask in your light.

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Remember, your light is needed. So, that those who are still trying to figure out how to ignite theirs may have someone to look up to; that they too may have someone to pull them to the front line and celebrate their shine.