Self-Pity Is The Worst Disease

For the past couple of weeks I have been allowing myself to feel like a bit of an under achiever. Yes, I said ALLOWING!

We, as a people, have this tendency of criticizing ourselves by comparing our failures and weaknesses with the next person's achievements and strengths. Not only is this the most saddest thing we do to ourselves but it’s also the most stupid and pathetic one ever. 

I read a quote, 100 years ago, where someone said that “self pity is the worst disease.” Nobody, and I mean nobody, likes being around anyone who enjoys throwing a pity party for themselves; it is such a drag! These kinds of people, and by these I mean every single one of us, bring such negative vibes. They can suck the life out of a 70 year old oak tree. 

You see, I’ve since realised that the thing about self pity is the failure to acknowledge and celebrate another’s success. At the back of our egotistical minds we somehow think we ought to be the ones being celebrated. And that, my friend, is called PRIDE. We have an “inherent” disability to covert another person’s things. Cain coveted Abel’s offering to the Lord and so on and so forth. It has been that way since the beginning of time. Why? Because neither of us is ever content with that which has been allotted to us; we somehow always seem to want more of everything. 

You see, everyone is different. That is what makes you you and me, well, me. My mother use to say that “ntho e tshwanang ha se yona” which roughly translates to “no one thing is the same.” Not even twins. I could spend all of my days working myself tirelessly trying to be better than Bonang Matheba. Well, that would be a waste of time because queen B has got that down. I could also work myself tirelessly trying to accumulate all the things the world defines as images of success but then again the world is a place filled with imperfect people who are trying to make themselves look and feel better by gaining a following that will put a stamp of approval on their low self-esteem. Yet again, that would be a waste of my time. 

The truth of the matter is that neither one of us will ever be content because neither one of us know who we are, we may  think we do, but we don’t. We don’t because  we haven’t taken  the time to get to know who we truly are and what is it that we like. We are out here allowing  the ideals of who we are be polluted by worldly of who we ought to be and if we aren’t, well then, we just don’t measure up. One thing we fail to realize is that you get to teach the world how to treat you by showing them who you are, not the other way around. Trust me, I know, it gets exhausting having being made to feel like you have to explain yourself and your choices because you choose to follow a different path; It’s exhausting because it’s unnatural. You aren’t suppose to explain yourself to anyone because you owe no one any explanation. The trick is, again, to sit down with yourself and get to know you; not only that but to be okay with who you find. So, do yourself a favour and be kind to yourself. Take yourself out on dates and enjoy your own company by shutting the voices of the world out even if it’s just for an hour. If anything, do it for yourself. Like Michael Jackson sang it “start with the man in the mirror” because If you won’t no one else will.